...news, moderately offensive commentary, f-bombs...

Saturday, May 8, 2010

this explains everything

Have you ever been merrily driving along listening to the Jonas Brothers or whatever when some asshole cuts you off, and you're suddenly overwhelmed by the desire to make a shelter out of that person's skin? Well now we know why:

The draft sequence of the Neanderthal genome, obtained from DNA fragments extracted from 40,000-year-old bones, shows that ancestors of modern Eurasians interbred to some extent with the Neanderthals they encountered as they moved out of Africa between 50,000 and 80,000 years ago.

The discovery, published in the journal Science , contradicts the view of most palaeontologists that there was no interbreeding between Neanderthals and modern humans.

Right, grandpa10. You only "talked" and went out on "one date". Way to slum it.

But hey, good news for Africans finally:

To their surprise, the researchers found that everyone of Eurasian origin – including people from East Asian and New Guinea where Neanderthals never lived – carried a similar amount of Neanderthal DNA, while sub-Saharan Africans had none.

Yea yea, AIDS, poverty, ecological disaster, "government", sure. Well you know what? At least we didn't FUCK NEANDERTHALS.

All this, by the way, on the day the S&P drops 8% in 5 minutes because some dingus forgot his dialing wand and typed a "b" for "billion" instead of an "m", which is significantly less, according to math. But they are very close on the keyboard almost.

[below]: Citigroup trading desk reacts to the share price collapse of Squirrel Pelts, Plc. Thursday. (photo: Bloomberg)


No comments: