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Saturday, January 24, 2009

brotherly advice

Dick (Penis) Parsons, the new token black guy chairman of Citigroup, wants you stupid hippies to shut up while the grownups are talking.

Mr Parsons told the Financial Times the new administration should replicate the Resolution Trust Corporation, the government-owned "bad bank" charged with buying assets from failed savings and loans companies in the 1980s and 1990s.

"I lived through the first crisis," said Mr Parsons, who ran Dime Bank, a small lender, between 1991 and 1995. "I remember one of the keys to bottoming out of the crisis was the presence of the RTC . . . We now need something along those lines."

Mr Parsons suggested banks that sold assets to the new entity - also known as an "aggregator bank" - should be required to use some of the proceeds for loans to companies and individuals.

However, he argued that the nationalisation of troubled financial institutions would be misguided. "People who talk about this have no idea how complicated these things are," he said.

Complicated indeed. So complicated, in fact, that Penis Parsons neglects to mention that the Resolution Trust Corporation (RTC) didn't rescue the S&L's. The FSLIC (the FDIC for S&L's) nationalized failed S&L's before liquidating them, wiping out shareholders, publicly bare-bottom spanking their managements, etc. The RTC was left to pick over the remnants so taxpayers could recoup some of the cost of bailing them out.

All this is missing from Penis Parons' fantasy RTC, which will have the government simply buy the shitty assets that make his bank so shitty so he wont have to worry about it anymore. You can just dump your money in the hole there, Mr. Obama, thanks.

Also, "Dime Bank"? Haha, really?

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